How should I respond to pushback from other parents?

[.style-intro]Many parents have questions or doubts about delaying smartphones – and that’s completely understandable. From worries about peer pressure and social exclusion to safety, tech literacy, and staying connected, we’ve heard it all. In this article, we unpack 10 of the most common concerns families have, and offer practical, reassuring responses to help you feel confident in your decision.[.style-intro]
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Q. Are you anti-tech?
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A. No, we're pro-childhood.

This movement isn't anti-tech – we love technology when it's used at the right time, in the right way. We just believe that kids don't need constant access to a smartphone, and that they're better off developing tech skills in a controlled and productive way. It's about balance, not banning.

Q. Shouldn't this be a personal choice for each family?

A. Yes – but for those that want to delay, we need to coordinate

No one is forcing anyone to do anything. But many parents **want** to hold off on smartphones and feel pressured into giving in because 'everyone else has one'. The Parent Pact just makes it easier for families to **delay together** so that parents feel supported in their decision.

Q. I want my child to be tech literate, won't I be holding them back if they don't have a smartphone?

A. Tech literacy isn't achieved through smartphone use.

Being tech-savvy isn't about scrolling through TikTok – it's about knowing how to use technology productively. Kids can build digital skills through schoolwork, coding programs, and creative tools like music or video editing. The best way to prepare kids for the digital world is teaching them to think critically about technology, not just giving them unlimited access to it.

Q. Don't we just need to teach our kids to use these devices responsibly?

A. Education and access aren't the same thing.

We teach young people about safe sex and how to drive long before they actually do these things on their own. In the same way, we can help children understand technology without handing them a smartphone from an early age. Because the truth is, no matter how much we try to teach them, kids simply aren't wired to use smartphones 'responsibly'. Their brains are still developing, and let's be honest, even most adults struggle to resist. That's why instead of giving kids access to an entire digital world in their pocket, we recommend starting with a simple phone.

Q. How will I keep in touch with my child on their way to and from school?

A. Try a basic phone.

We get it – every family wants to keep their child safe. But here's the thing: a basic phone (calls and texts only) does the job without exposing them to the risks of social media and the internet. In fact, a smartphone might actually make their journey *less* safe. Since smartphones became the norm, child muggings have soared – 500 kids are targeted every single day in the UK. Then there's the distraction factor: 1 in 5 secondary school students who use their phone while walking have been hit or had a near miss with a car, and the vast majority (84%) admit to looking at their phone near roads. A basic phone keeps things simple. And safe.

Q. If my kid doesn't have a smartphone, will they be socially isolated?

A. No, their friendships will stay rooted in real connection

We get it – the peer pressure is real. But what we're seeing from many SFC kids who've started secondary school with a simple phone is that their friendships stay rooted in real connection, rather than the constant competition of online status and likes. They can still keep in touch through calls and texts, but the meaningful moments happen face-to-face – leading to deeper, more genuine relationships.

We know it can feel hard for your child, which is why delaying as a group via the Parent Pact makes all the difference. If your child knows there are others in their class who are also getting a simple phone first, the pressure for a smartphone with all the apps is massively reduced. Research shows that it takes 25% of a group to create a tipping point, where social norms start to shift. Together, we're creating a new norm – one that puts real connection first, for this generation and all those that follow.

Q: Can't we just use an old smartphone with parental controls?

A: Parental controls help, but they're not a magic fix

That old iPhone in your drawer might seem like an easy solution – free, familiar, and lockable. But before you hand it over, consider the bigger picture. Smartphones are designed to capture attention at all costs, and once your child has one, it's tough to step back.

Even with every restriction in place, there are loopholes. A 2024 Parentkind survey said 47% of children with parental controls on their smartphone had bypassed them. Kids find workarounds and no setting can stop your child from endlessly lobbying you for "just one app." That's why many families find it simpler to skip smartphones altogether and start with a basic phone – one that does what kids actually need (calls and texts) without pulling them into an addictive digital world.

Q. I think my child may benefit from online communities that they feel better understand them than their friends in school (e.g. LGBTQ+, neurodiverse groups).

A. Support without 24/7 access.

Online communities can be a great source of connection, especially for kids who feel isolated at school. But that doesn't mean they need constant access via a smartphone. Parents can help kids engage safely by using shared family devices, moderated platforms, and scheduled online time to connect with these communities – without opening the door to all the risks that come with unrestricted smartphone use.

Q: What if my child has a medical condition and needs a smartphone?

A: Do what's right for your child

If a child needs a smartphone for health reasons, then of course they should have one. The goal of this movement isn't to take away essential tools, but to help kids grow and thrive free from addictive tech.

We'd also encourage parents to think through all of the risks associated with smartphones when making a decision. As an example, screens can help some neurodiverse children to self-regulate, but these same children may be particularly at risk of cyber-bullying or some of the other challenges that come from social media. Consider ways to ensure your child gets what they need for their own conditions and circumstances, whilst also mitigating any potential downsides.

Q. Why is Smartphone Free Childhood on social media like WhatsApp and Instagram, isn't that hypocritical?

A. We're adults – and we have to fight fire with fire

We get the irony, but the reality is that social media – when used with intention – can be a powerful tool for bringing people together and spreading important messages. Adults can (mostly\!) decide how to use their time, and while we're not here to encourage more screen time, we also know that to reach people, we have to meet them where they are. There's a big difference between adults using social media to organise and campaign for something they believe in and kids being drawn into endless scrolling by addictive algorithms. Our goal isn't to ditch technology altogether – it's to help create a healthier balance, especially for kids who aren't yet equipped to navigate these platforms safely.