Can't I just give my kid an old locked down smartphone?
[.style-intro]We get it. You’ve got an old iPhone or Android sitting in a drawer, and it seems like a practical solution. It’s already paid for, you can lock it down with parental controls, and it gives your child a way to message you. So why not? Parental controls help, but they’re not a magic fix – and it's a slippery slope into a digital world that's hard to step back from. [.style-intro]
The myth of the 'safe' locked down smartphone
You can toggle every parental control, set up restrictions, and even install extra monitoring apps, but the reality is that Apple and Google don't build their devices with children's safety in mind.
Even when a device knows it's being used by a child (based on their Apple ID or Gmail birthday), loopholes remain. There are endless workarounds – search terms that slip through, VPNs that evade filters, and ways to access apps through browsers.
And when your child turns 13, the current age of 'internet adulthood', tech companies including Apple, Google and Microsoft will remove many of your supervision rights and safety settings. Things like setting downtime, tracking via GPS and blocking apps – because when your child turns 13, tech companies are legally allowed to remove safety settings. (You can turn them back on, but only if your child agrees to accept them.)
It's frustrating. Parents shouldn't have to be cybersecurity experts just to keep their kids safe. And yet, here we are, so let's figure out your options.
Parental controls: useful but not the ultimate solution
If you decide to give your child a smartphone, we definitely recommend using parental controls. They can provide protection and help set boundaries. But it's important to know that:
They're complex to set up and monitor. Even the most tech-savvy adults can struggle to stay ahead of every new loophole.
Kids find ways around them. According to a 2024 poll by the charity Parentkind, 47% of children with parental controls admit to bypassing them using tricks like VPNs, WiFi resets, and memorising passwords.
Not all parents and carers have the headspace or tech knowledge to use them. In the same survey 58% of teens say they've never had parental controls put on their phones. Most parents are busy enough just trying to get the next meal on the table, which is why we need better regulation – to protect all kids.
They create a false sense of security. You think you've got it sorted, until you realise you haven't. Many parents discover too late that their child has been exposed to harmful content despite restrictions.
If you are going to set up an old iPhone for your child, check out this handy video from our friends over at Protect Young Eyes on making it as safe as possible: Watch here
The slippery slope of 'just one app'
Even when you fully lock down the device, there's another challenge: social pressure.
Once your child has a smartphone, they'll want the same apps as their friends. Whether it's WhatsApp, Snapchat, TikTok or the latest trending game, they know that it's in your power to let them download it, if only they can persuade you. Holding fast in the face of a teenager lobbying for more is hard, and will require daily negotiations and a steadfast commitment to your values.
This is why many families find it simpler to hold the line and stick with a basic phone. That way, there's no option to download apps and no point in your child nagging you for TikTok. It makes life simpler, especially when others in your school community are doing the same. When everyone's in it together, the pressure eases, and kids don't get FOMO.
What's the alternative?
A smartphone isn't just a tool for messaging – it's a gateway to an entire digital world. And that world is designed to be addictive. These devices hijack kids' dopamine circuits, pulling them away from the real-life experiences, relationships and activities that help them grow into happy, resilient adults.
Instead of a smartphone, consider a simple phone – one that allows calls and texts but doesn't come with the risks of constant connectivity. It removes the battles over apps, the stress of monitoring, and the worry of online exposure.
The good news is, there are more and more great options for simple phones coming to market. Check out our child-safe phone guide for the low-down on the best options out there.
Think twice before giving your child your old smartphone
If you do choose to give your child a smartphone, parental controls can really help – but they're not a guarantee. Loopholes exist. Kids find workarounds. And even the most locked-down smartphone still opens the door to a digital world that's hard to control.
If you’re feeling unsure, you’re not alone. The truth is, the only way to be sure your child won’t stumble into something they’re not ready for is to hold off on smartphones for now.
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There’s no shame in pausing. And here’s the hopeful bit: you’re not the only one thinking this way. More and more parents are choosing to wait – and every time one of us does, it gets that little bit easier for everyone else. Together, we’re building a new kind of normal – one that puts childhood first.
